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misanthropic-visions

3rd post

I haven't stepped on a weighing scale in months. I'm "5'4" and the last time I checked my weight was in January and I was about 132 lbs. Later on I started becoming more self-conscious then I already was and I know I lost some weight and probably weigh in 128 lbs or so. I've always been very insecure and careful about my weight. Since most of my family is overweight/obese, except my younger brother who's actually very underweight, so i've always been told to "watch it" and "be careful" so I don't end up like Mom or older sister. I know that if I want to be healthy I just have to eat "right" and exercise on a day to day basis. I just don't know if i'll be able to do it since i'll be starting college in the fall and going out of town starting next week. Plus, I'm not dorming, and commuting is a big hassle and since my sister "did it." I should be able to as well. Personally, I don't like the idea and it really hurts that I'll probably never be able to be independent like my friends whose parents fully trust them and have KNOW that their child will be just fine without them.- I wish to live on my own and be away from their mess. Although I know I will struggle, at least I know what the actually reality there is that I need to be ready for. 

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